Love may tear you apart

I’m out on a lunch date with a girl.

our topic of conversations are usually the silent ones where she looks at me and I can’t stand it, so I look away, usually down, and I give a quick smile, but quick enough so she won’t see it,  so she wont know she can do that to me.

I can already tell this is stuff that’s gonna kill me, but it’s the stuff I live for.

the conversation begins to die. literally.

girl: “hey, this may sound dumb, but I don’t think I can have a boyfriend that can’t kill a zombie. If something happens, and I believe it will, I need my boyfriend to be able to kill a zombie”

my ambitions are low.

me: “I could kill….zombies.”

is my timing that flawed?

me: “look, if your kid turns into a zombie, I’m gonna kill it…I mean, her., I mean, it. it’s a zombie. I’ll probably have you look the other way, or if you want, I take off her jaw, chop off her hands. I mean, it all depends on how old she is if an outbreak happens.”

But emotions won’t grow

later that day, I day dream about zombies, I day dream about scratches and how one scratch can make you turn. what if it happened to someone I really care about, what if it happened to her? would I able to see her go thru the transformation? it takes hours, sometimes days. id have to contain her, then id have to bash her brains. She’s not that smart. Maybe I could pull a Romeo and let her scratch my skin so I could turn into a zombie too.

star crossed zombie lovers.

but can that happen?

I don’t think zombies have any compassion and they wouldn’t dare try to hold hands or make out in front of other dead zombies.

All my failings exposed.

but I guess when you’re smitten, when you like someone, you do these kinds of things, no thinking twice.

I like it, it feels good…but are zombie feelings the same as humans?

alive, but dead inside. dead, but a life outside

would her blood be as red as mine?

me: “if the living get a scratch, I’m killing them. If your mom gets a scratch, I’m killing her.”

girl: “no, let me do my mom. I wanna do my mom.”

Yet there’s still this appeal.